Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
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