i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize