so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
Randomize