So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Randomize
