she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
