She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
