she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
Small penises have feelings too.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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