why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
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