I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Randomize
