he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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