Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
So I just went to clothing optional bar
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
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