In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Randomize
