Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
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