I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Randomize
