Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
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