your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Randomize