now i know why i became what i already was.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Randomize
