After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
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