OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
