help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Randomize
