My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Randomize
