.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Randomize
