Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
