Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize
