There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
Randomize
