Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
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