talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
