He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Randomize