And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
