And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
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