dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
