I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
In America we eat man semen.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
