Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
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