I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
