She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
I need help removing her.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Randomize
