just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize
