Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Randomize
