Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
Randomize
