biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
