whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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