White coat. Heels.
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
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