In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
Randomize
