her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
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