she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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