i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
