wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize