explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
