She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
Randomize
