he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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