just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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